Waiting
by theGirlwholivesinURcloset
Summary: It wasn't something Cosmo liked to think about. But then, Cosmo didn't really liked to think about anything. One shot with maybe a sequel to come...


My first story on here :) I have many more too. Which I might post... maybe... xD

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><p>It wasn't something Cosmo liked to think about. But then, Cosmo didn't really like to think about anything. And yet, lately, he hadn't been able to keep it out of his mind. He tried to force back the desperate fantasies, the aching want and <strong>need <strong>for his young godson, the emotions that were far too strong to be considered appropriate. But how could he? Love wasn't his fault, he had no control over it. And so, he was just…waiting.

It was one of those tired, hot summer days when the dust seems to stick like a coat of paint to your skin. The sun was low in the orangey sky, still several hours from it's final descent as a huge, burning marble below the horizon. Ray's of swirling light crept through the wide open window and onto the paper filled desk.

Timmy had been in his room for the past hour, frantically studying for a math test. He couldn't understand a single thing he was looking at.

"Cosmo." the boy looked up at his green haired, floating godfather anxiously.

The fairy flushed with pleasure when his godson moaned his name. Thoughts that really shouldn't have been there flashed through his mind before he rapidly locked them away again.

"Wh-what is it Timmy?" Cosmo's throat felt dry and parched, he needed water, He also needed Timmy. Crushing that dream, he floated over to where the boy sat.

"If I don't ace this test, I'm gonna fail the grade Cosmo!" Timmy wiped his sweaty bangs out of his sapphire eyes, eyes that Cosmo couldn't look directly into for fear of losing his control.

Swallowing with difficulty, due to the dryness of his throat, Cosmo took a deep breath. His arm rested on the back of the chair.

"Uh, what is it you're having trouble with?" He asked, unable to stop his heart from pounding as he leaned closer. The sweet scent of Timmy's hair made him a little dizzy..

"Ugh! Everything!" Timmy groaned and tilted his head back on his chair. The fairy smelled like lime and kiwi, he noticed, and his stomach leapt a little. Cosmo bit his lip nervously, the warm shoulders of his godson fit perfectly against his outstretched arm. How could something so wrong feel so…right?

Timmy looked up at the shaking, sweating fairy with concern in his bright eyes.

"What's wrong Cosmo?" He asked, reaching his slender fingers up to feel his godfathers forehead, "you have a fever!"

"Uh-uh" Oh God, Cosmo thought, oh shit. "Y-you- I mean, it-it's just really hot!"

"Hm, yeah, maybe that's why I can't concentrate!" Timmy mumbled, he watched the way the little fairy's shirt stick to his chest with sweat, how sexy, he thought, a smile covering his lips slowly.

Cosmo grinned weakly back at the boy, but if he didn't get away soon he knew he'd lose it and end up kissing those soft lips.

"M-m-maybe you sh-should go have a shower to cool off and I'll look over this math work for you . We can talk about it when you get back, you won't fail Timmy, I promise!" Cosmo reassured him.

"OK!" Timmy smiled and pulled the green-haired fairy into a heart-stopping hug before leaving the room. Collapsing back onto the bed, Cosmo let out a whoosh of breathe. He poofed himself a much needed glass of water and sighed deeply.

"Fuck." He pushed the palms of his hands to his eyelids. Wanting hurt, thinking hurt. He couldn't have Timmy, he knew that, he shouldn't even love him like this. This love that brought actual, physical pain to his heart. The boy was too young, too naïve to understand. And yet, at 10, he was perhaps more mature than Cosmo ever would be.

"No excuse" He grumbled to himself getting up to look at Timmy's study notes. The math the boy was doing was far above his grade level; Cosmo stared at it blankly before something clicked. Sometimes, he wasn't so stupid as some people thought.

Timmy returned, hair dripping wet, feet bare. He pulled a dark pink shirt over his head. Cosmo stopped breathing for a moment. Why was his godchild so beautiful, so perfect? And so innocent. If he'd been older, it might have been different. But he wasn't. So like many times before, Cosmo smiled and sighed, resigning himself to the unattainability of the boy before him. "Come on Timmy, time to study."

Timmy groaned but smiled right back at his godfather, hopping onto the chair again. He knew Cosmo would try to make this fun for him.

And maybe this is enough for me, Cosmo decided, it wasn't a kiss or a whispered "I love you" in the dark. It barely soothed the pain of loving the boy he couldn't have. But maybe he could just enjoy these moments together, even if they didn't last. Even if the boy didn't love him in the same way, he could somehow handle it, he would manage as he had before.

And if there was ever the chance of Timmy loving him back, Cosmo knew he would always be there, just… waiting.


End file.
